We Asked 938 Moms To Describe Their Mother's Day In One Word And The Only Word They Could Think Of Was "Crummy"
Once a year in the United States we choose to honor the women who give us life and are there for us through thick and thin. Yet, when it comes to American moms, they couldn't be more disappointed in you. In a comprehensive survey of 938 mothers, each and every mom surveyed in our poll described their special day as "crummy".
Perhaps even more shockingly, the word "crummy" wasn't even an option in our questionnaire! Nevertheless, 937 out of 938 mothers polled chose to write in the word "crummy" to describe May 13th with one woman writing in "ruthlessly crummy" after opting to tick the box marked "other, please explain".
In follow up interviews, American moms couldn't conceal their bitterness when recounting their Mother's Day and the disappointments of motherhood generally. Respondents describe receiving perfunctory phone calls, generic Hallmark cards and unsatisfactory gifts. "Much to my chagrin, my son Larry called me this morning," remarked a peeved mother in Decatur, Illinois. "It's times like these, I'm glad he lives in another state. He truly is a shit".
Another mother from upstate New York surveyed in our poll described the existential dread of another the annual holiday. "Another Mother's Day comes and goes and I wake up more dejected and disgusted than before. Another relentlessly crummy Mother's Day behind me. Another card arrives in my mail and finds its way the trash, lost in the swirl of shapes and things".
Wow! How did you become such a bad son?