Report: As Boomers Begin To Age They May Have Increasing Difficulty Remembering Names, Installing Fascist Dictatorships

Report: As Boomers Begin To Age They May Have Increasing Difficulty Remembering Names, Installing Fascist Dictatorships

Caring for an aging loved one is never easy. As baby boomers reach their autumn years they may feel a loss of autonomy and self-esteem. Upon retirement they may lash out in frustration as the world around them changes at a frenetic pace. Most painfully, they may have increasing difficulty performing simple tasks like remembering names and installing fascist dictatorships. As loving children we must show our aging relatives the same patience they showed us as children and help them maintain their dignity as cognitive decline sets in and as their sadistic dreams of achieving ultimate power crumble in embarrassing displays of incompetence and impotence.

Recep Tayyip Erdogan, 65, is by no means over-the-hill. He takes very good care of himself and- as the president of Turkey- is very active for his age. However, concerned relatives and hard-line members of the Justice and Development Party know all too well that the would-be tyrant is no spring chicken either. AKP loyalists have noticed that when Erdogan leaves the greatly augmented presidential palace-newly renovated and refurbished with public funds- he often forgets his keys. Loved ones have noticed that he also loses his place in his fiery speeches demonizing the Kurds. What’s more, municipal elections this April proved to be a major setback for the befuddled leader. In times like this, it’s important that aging despots keep their minds sharp. Crossword puzzles are said to work wonders for seniors and can play a big role in staving off dementia.

Sadly such remedies are too little too late for some. A case study of cognitive decline in an aging demagogue is Jair Bolsonaro, the 64-year-old Brazilian leader. After a long army career and an unremarkable 30 year stint in congress it looked like the far-right ideologue could look forward to bonding with his special needs children throughout a long, comfortable retirement in Rio de Janeiro. Sadly for Bolsonaro, due to factors far outside of his control the doddering old fogy was elected president of the world’s eighth largest economy. Susceptible to crackpot film-flam salesmen and overly indulgent of his profoundly retarded children, Bolsonaro has lurched from crisis to crisis, failing time and again to make headway on pension reform as landed oligarchs lose their patience. What’s more, an embarrassing accident with a knife during the 2018 election has left the pitiful old man incontinent, incapable of controlling his bowels, let alone congress. 

In cases of advanced dementia among aspiring strongmen it is important for family members and close friends to form tight knit support networks. Nowhere is this principle clearer than in the case of Donald J. Trump. Despite severe cognitive decline, Trump has never seemed to lose his passion for life. In his twilight years Trump enjoys watching political talk shows, golf and occasionally executing the office of president of the United States which he does on a semi-retired basis. It is always gratifying to see seniors continue to work into their old age and the what’s even more impressive is that this president is 72 years young. Nevertheless, it is clear to most of his advisers that Trump is visibly sundowning in increasingly rambling and incoherent remarks and meetings with world leaders. Fortunately for Trump, White House aides are attentive to the president and have assigned a devoted team of home-health aides to clean up after him along with a coterie of caring and compassionate generals to guide him through important decisions regarding foreign policy.

Wayne Lapierre Tells NRA Members That Latte-Sipping New York Lawyers Are Persecuting Latte-Sipping New York NRA Officials

Wayne Lapierre Tells NRA Members That Latte-Sipping New York Lawyers Are Persecuting Latte-Sipping New York NRA Officials

  EON Productions Announces Next James Bond Will Be Gritty And realistic, Involuntarily Celibate  

EON Productions Announces Next James Bond Will Be Gritty And realistic, Involuntarily Celibate